Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl, Girl, Girl . . .

Upon arrival to Skidmore I was promptly made aware of two percentages. First that a hundred percent of the squirrels on this campus are nuts, and secondly 60%-40%. If I have to tell what these percentages mean then clearly you do not go to Skidmore, or you go to Skidmore and are Helen Keller. How is it that everyone from science and English majors to theater and sociology majors can know one percentage? The answer is simple; it is the most important percentage on campus. The percentage of 60% female to 40% male student body on campus makes the girls mad and the men hopeful. Now the precise science up picking up females is not a game of numbers but instead ratios. The way I saw it when I came into this school is the student body isn’t that large but there are approximately 1.5 females for every guy on campus. A date with one girl is awkward enough imagine the additional .5. What this ratio combined with college really results in is a crazy hook-up culture. I know I am some sort of freak because I am a male that likes dating and a relationship. Lets just say being a relationship guy in a hook up world is like a (insert metaphor). It turns out, for me at least, the ratio isn’t everything it is cracked up to be. My point is my first impression of 60%-40% was wrong.

Death by Dining Hall

As a desperate poor college student I decided I would take advantage of a little thing called the work-study program. A work schedule that was easily to set up around classes and the paycheck every two weeks was motivation enough for me. Also how bad can it be making sandwiches or wiping down tables. It didn’t take me long to figure out those weren’t the only jobs in the dining hall. My ability to get stuck with the worst possible jobs is almost impressive. One exciting job I had was wiping down the inside of the steamers. I know what you are thinking, “Steamer that sounds hot,” and you would be right. Another fun task was scrubbing who knows what off the walls in the refrigerator. Again I bet you are thinking,  “That sounds really cold,” and once again you would be right. Finally there is the pain of a three-hour shift. You are probably thinking, “That doesn’t seem that long,” and you could not be anymore wrong. Somehow the dining hall supervisors have managed to slow time for workers. A three-hour work shift feels like at least twice that. Now I don’t know what device is capable of slowing down time but I do know it exist in the dining hall. My point is, my first impression of working in the dining hall was wrong.

Peas Stop

So, lets get right to the point, the Black Eyed Peas. What are you doing? I really enjoyed the “Where is the Love” days.  A catchy song with a message, can’t argue with that. The Black Eyed Peas started off strong with songs catchier than an infectious disease. They continued being catchy, but that’s not all infectious diseases and their songs have in common now days. Recently we have been blessed with the instant classics like ”Boom Boom Pow” and “Imma Be”. Its great to see them supporting proper grammar. This week they performed at the Super Bowl and it’s easy to say it would have been more enjoyable if viewed on mute. The least they could of done is found someone who knew how to sing to replace Fergie. Will.i.am also needs to just move to the moon so his choice of clothing starts making sense. Although I fear a plastic clear hair molded helmet isn’t even cool their. The more music the Black Eyed Peas put out, the more crappy and catchy songs I have to hear on the radio every 30 seconds, which shouldn’t be possible because its about a two minute song, but somehow they manage it. My point is, my first impression of the Black Eyed Peas was wrong.

The Bulge

So, men’s dance tights. Before I go any farther you are probably thinking, “Why do you need dance tights?” and to that I say,” You know cause they uh . . . make you jump harder and runner higher. . . mind your own business.” As a rule of thumb males are not large fans of clothing that is very tight around the crotchle region. Also, unless you are in a hair metal band you really have no excuse to be wearing something tight enough to show off that region. Not only are men’s tights generally uncomfortable to the public’s eye but they also seem like they would be uncomfortable to wear. This is where I was wrong, after extensive time in dance tights, turns out they are pretty wonderful. The feeling resembles a very weak hug around all of your waist and legs. Ask any male about wearing tights after about an hour and I am sure the response will be, “This is right.” A roommate of mine has been caught saying that he “feels like superman at times” whilst wearing a pair. It turns out that dance tights are quite comfortable; don’t get me wrong it is still traumatizing if you catch a glimpse in the wrong light. My point is my first impression was wrong.